Thank You June. Gratitude in Times of Difficulty
My current situation isn’t the best we are currently in a bit of a pickle. I don’t feel the need to dramatise my life on here, it’s a mess at the moment and every time I talk to my friends right now I feel like the eastenders theme tune should start in the background. I don’t like being victim either, I don’t like people tilting their head in sympathy or trying to talk it OK. I’m being accountable, I’m trying to work through a constant list of things to keep me on track and get our lives back to normal and when I’m not doing that I just try being as present and in the moment as possible. I’m becoming consciously mindful and I’m seeing, feeling and being thankful for the beauty of the people and places I’m surrounded by. I’m also noticing my feelings and the lessons when I don’t feel so great too, just being aware not too hard on myself or getting sucked into a personal pitty party for too long.
June was the month I said no to stuff, the month I took myself off Facebook (deleted the app, don’t post and only check every 3 days as apposed to every 3 minutes) and the month I spent more quality time alone in counselling, in reflection, in moments of indulgence too and the month I spent more time with the people I care about who feel me with the utmost joy.
And looking back over my photos through June there were a lot more moments that despite my chaotic life are filled with joy and happy memories. People who made me smile and laugh, places that helped me escape the stress and upset that can be the day to day.
Happy Birthday to Me
June was also the month I turned 31, more a new year for me than January I done a lot of inward reflection as to who I am. It all felt right although a little lost, bare and raw at times.
I’m not promising to get back to blogging, I’ve done that too many times and just beat myself up when I don’t stick to what i kept typing, it’s just another thing that made me feel I was failing. I put pressure on and sucked the joy right out.
I’m back to just doing it for me, because it’s what I love and enjoy.
So Happy Birthday To Me,
Thank You June.